Swine Flu hits the Burns/Leone Household

Jess (roomie, sent home early from work): Wahhhhhh I feel funny
Me: What kind of funny????
Jess: I don't knowwww
Me: What feels funny???
Me: Are you drinking mad water??
Me: And lysoling your footsteps as you walk around the apt?!
Jess: haha well I'm drinking tea of course and I had ice cream and cereal for lunch (editor's note: this is normal behavior)
Jess: I don't want water
Me: I WANT YOU TO WANT WATER
Me: GAHHHHHHH
Me: I'M GOING TO DIEEE
Jess: What do you mean?!?!!!
Me: IT'S THE SWINE!
Jess: How do you know?
**5 minute delay**
Jess: Uh ohhhh, I just got really hot
Jess: Would you mind stopping at CVS or something and getting me a thermometer?
Me: OMG I'm not coming home
Me: I'll drop your treats off on the doorstep
Me: I'll be living in the motor home (note: our upstairs neighbor is moving back to CA so there is a massive moving truck in front of our apt) currently parked in our yard
Me: If you never see me again it's because I got shipped to California
Jess: Omg what??
Me: *signs off gchat*

MegBurns